heart fart

some real weird shit happened since i typed in this box last. first, i got a full body massage and the dude farted while massaging my legs. it didn't smell but it made a distinct brrrappp! and i felt trapped in a "what would larry david do?" moment. i just froze, pretended nothing happened and faked sleeping when he told me we were finished. second, i went over to kimbot's place to play with her new karaoke machine and we wound up singing from 9pm to 5am. straight. seriously. no fucking breaks; just chugging beers and singing for your life. soooo good... if not slightly psychotic.

also, spitfist made a bunch of videos of us playing live in our new jam space. we're gonna release one a week or something till we run out. the first video single is sXe boy and it's up on youtube now. head over and watch it or i'll cut your little chicken heart out and eat it on risotto. innard fucking risotto.

fatty fatty two by four

well, i've been 28 for a couple weeks now. it's alright. i mean, lately i'm actually enjoying growing older. it feels empowering... i think? either way, i had a party for my birthday. i made a sweet chocolate slab cake that is slowly becoming my signature dish. we had dozens and dozens of raw oysters waiting to be shucked, cheeses, meats, RIBS, bread, booze, buddies... everything i could have hoped for! in fact, multiple nights over the course of the holidays were filled with more food than i should have eaten and i'm paying the price for that now.

so, phil and i are making a conscious effort to cut back on portion sizes because we tend to eat like kings, in the middle of the week, for no reason. jesus, if you knew how much butter we went through you'd think we were lunatics! we like rich food; we like restaurant quality meals when ever we want them and, honestly, i like having pretty food to take pictures of. there are a couple moments, however, when i'm struck by the beauty in a fast food burger, a dollar store chocolate orange or a heaping bowl of bright orange mac n cheese, straight out of a box.

the story of my home: part one (the table)

well, here it is! the final reveal of the dining room table i started talking about months ago. i rushed and organized and cleaned all christmas break so this room would be ready for my birthday party but really i just couldn't wait any longer to take some sweet photos and post them here. i'm really proud of all the work we've put into our place (and how little money we've spent along the way) and could not wait any longer to share. so, here we are.



i've fit my camera collection on the left. i found this sturdy as hell shelving unit two apartments ago half buried in an unused flowerbed out back. i hosed it off and have since used it as a tv stand, bookshelf and now to anchor the center point of our living/dining room. the print hanging above is a collage of spadina avenue doorways taken by phil. the records and turntable are nestled in the corner with my current plant (black thumb) and some art done by friends. (clockwise: doublenaut, jesse harris, stephanie lund/paul ferguson).



the wood for the dining room table was salvaged from an old barn table my mom found at the side of the road. we sanded it, cut off the undercarriage and attached new legs from ikea. it's sturdy as hell and long enough to sit eight friends. if you follow me on twitter you'll recognize the photos hanging on either side of the tv (they're mine and i was pretty excited when i finally hung them). they're printed by a standard office printer on standard legal paper (easy to do at work, no?) and mounted on dollar store bristol board. we found the frames on the street, painted them black and boom! art hung for under two bucks. all of phil's geets are hanging on the far right. we really try to use the vertical space in our apartment and these wall hangers (that i got on discount when i worked at a music shop) were a great fit! while there are some things i'll be tweeking as we go i'm happy with the way to place looks now and we put it together for about a hundred bucks!