June 03, 2009

i'm under attack.

raccoons have been digging at our windowsill all winter/spring. i'm afraid they're going to smash through the glass one night and eat us all in our sleep.

it's irrational, i know.
but, for real, i had a pack of squirrels throwing their little bodies at the attic door inside my closet when i was younger and it has traumatized me for life. i can't tell what animals are thinking and i know they must hate us. i'm scared the cats will revolt sometimes.

i was leaning out my window having a smoke and heard the streetcar ding.
i looked down on a pair of raccoons crossing the tracks, walking across the street and strolling down the sidewalk towards the alley that leads to my house. within minutes they were scratching at my window and backdoor. they dug and scratched. forever. i tried a camera flash to get rid of them, putting the cats up to the windows, yelling, clapping... nothing works on these toronto 'coons.

anyway, i had to put a brick and a bunch of wood in the window and hose down the shit (read: literal shit) with bleach. i did it right after work as i'm scared to go out after dark. i moved the chive plant they always eat to the other side of the deck, so hopefully that'll stop the window smashing/corpse devouring that's likely to ensue.

in the meantime - sunshine and barbecue.


1 comment:

Matt. said...

Once a couple of years ago I was sitting and watching "BJ and the Bear" and I heard the screen door slide open. I didn't hear anyone step in, and I was in the house by myself, so I leisurely got up to see what the commotion was about. There was a Raccoon in my house. It had opened the door and walked in.
My instinctual scream of "What the fuck??" scared it off, with a hiss in my direction.
I closed the screen door and the heavy glass door and went back to the couch a little shaken.
Later when I walked by, the screen door was again open. Fuckin' Raccoons, man.